Once upon a time, over the Operence, in a distant kingdom there was a fisherman. This fisherman didn’t have other wealth than an old boat and fishing net. He had been catching plenty of fish for years, but after the sinkage of an oil tanker the fish population got remarkably smaller and that posed a threat to the fisherman’s subsistence. He had nothing else to do, he had to find a new job as it got harder and harder to make the ends meet with all the increased taxes and prices. What is more he had as many children as many holes there are on a sieve, nay one more, but the sum of the child benefit was ridiculously little and because of the new laws there were paid only until three children. After all these it is obvious that the fisherman lived really hard times.
One day the fisherman went to the city to find a job, but he was sent away from everywhere because of his lack of proper education and professional experience. The fisherman got really embittered and he said with anger: “Ah, it can’t be true in what a damnable worl we live! This damn big bureaucracy! I wouldn’t wish that kind of unliveable world even for my enemies!” A wealthy man passed by who, after having heard the fisherman’s words, started to feel pity for him and said to him: “You poor man, I see you’re living hard times. I have a proposal for you: work for me for minimum wage.” And the fisherman was glad for the opportunity and accepted the offer. And the rich man said only that: “Be exactly at eight o’clock at 13 Wattle Street.” And poor fisherman didn’t know that he had just sold his soul to the Evil.
Next morning the poor fisherman was standing by 13 Wattle Street. After one hour of waiting the rich man appeared. When he saw the fisherman, he said: “You’re a proper man, you were punctual. And now your task: our company is about to conquer the waters. As I know that you’re a fisherman, so you know the capriciousness of the waters, I entrust you to drive our vehicles.” And with that the lord took the fisherman to a big metal box. And the fisherman was just gazing at it and wondered what kind of gear it could be and was really surprised to see that such thing existed. And the lord showed the fisherman how to use the metal monster and then left him alone. And the fisherman splashed down and the box became full of people. But the fisherman couldn’t navigate properly the metal box and soon he got wrecked. The rich man appeared immediately and he was full of fury. “What are you doing, you fisherman? – he asked angrily – As a punishment you’ll be a ticket collector from today.” And he gave an armband to the fisherman.
The fisherman’s life became hell from that day. Endless fights, humiliations and overall many-many scallywags... the fisherman felt as a beached fish. One day he was walking on the riverbank and was brooding about his tragic fate when he heard a voice: “Dear fisherman, - said the voice which belonged to a fish – if you put me back into the water, I’ll fulfill three of your wishes.” But the fisherman didn’t believe the fish and wanted to test it: “I want the metro four to be built!” – he said, and as these words left his mouth, a subway appeared out of nowhere immediately and next to it there was a sign with number four written on it. The fisherman became very happy, because he saw that it really was a wonder-worker fish and he said his second wish: “I want my family not to be in necessity anymore.” “All right, – said the fish – now I have opened an unfailing bank account for you.” Only the third wish was left. The fisherman was thinking for a while and then said: “I want the chief executive officer of BKV (Transport of Budapest Corp.) to die in aortic dissection!” The reason he said that was that he suffered a lot as a ticket collector because of him.
The days passed by and the fisherman and his family were living in wealth thanks to the goldfish. One day they were having lunch when flames bursted up in the room and a terribly ugly giant hamster-like monster appeared. “Fisherman – it said – I came for your life!” “What do you want from me, you monster?” – asked the fisherman incomprehensively. “I’ll take your pitiable life – responded the monster – because those must be punished who wish bad things for my posessor.” “And who is your posessor?” – asked the fisherman. “My posessor is the Devil itself – answered the monster – for whom you wished aortic dissection.” The fisherman became mortified after hearing these words, he sensed that he was in big trouble. And the monster cut the fisherman in half with one swish. The fisherman said to his family with his last breath: “I will die soon, but the most important thing, my children, that you must stick together and love each other.” And with that he died. The family of the fisherman became very sad.
The children didn’t take their father’s advice and soon started to think about how to cut each other out from the heritage. All of them wanted to have the exclusive ownership of the unfailable bank account. As the legal heir was the eldest son, he was the most unwanted person in the other’s eyes. So they came up with an evil plan against him. As part of the demonic plan, they organised a visit to the meat packing plant nearby. When they had plotted it, they said to their brother: “Jürgen, we have a unique chance. We can see from close how the salami is made!” - “Why should that concern me? – asked Jürgen – Anyways I’m a vegetarian.” – “Nay Jürgen, - said the others – knowledge is power.” Finally they managed to convince Jürgen to go with them.
And the brothers went to the meat packing plant. They took a look at all the machines and devices and when they got to the grinder, they pushed Jürgen in. Jürgen started to cry out loud and as the flesh was peeling off his bones he shouted back with his last strength: Curse on you, my foul brothers! May you all burn in the flames of Gehenna! And after that he got grinded and died.
So the fisherman’s children became one person less. But they still were as numbrous as the Russian army, so still there wasn’t any peace at the fisherman’s household. The next target was the second son, because he was the oldest brother alive, the legal heir. The others united against him. There were big heavy aluminium shutters in the house. And the brothers came up with a dreadful idea. They put sharp knives at the bottom of one shutter. Then they called their brother to the window saying: “Günter, come quickly to the window, you have to see it!” And Günter went to the window to see what his brothers had seen. And then the brothers pulled down the shutter which immediately cut Günter’s head off. Günter’s head rolled off to the stream nearby and it left a bloody trace.
So the brothers became one more person less. But they still weren’t few enough to live in peace. So again the younger ones united against the oldest. They had been thinking for a long time about the implementation of the murder when on a bright sunny they they got the inspiration. In their garden the grass had grown big and the oldest brother went out to mow the lawn. Then all the repressed agression came out in the siblings and they attacked their brother. And he was powerless against such numerical superiority. The others took the lawnmower and went over their brother with it. Blood was splurging and pieces of flesh were flying everywhere. And the garden became crimson red.
One more brother less. They were only seven. But they still weren’t few enough. The brothers united again against the legal heir. They didn’t have for too long for the right time. One day their brother was swimming in the pool in the garden, because he was a synchronized swimmer. The brothers got tempted by the Evil and they had a demonic idea. They took a microwave oven and they threw it into the water. Karl, the oldest, died immediately from electric shock.
There were only six brothers. Of course the others started to plot again against the oldest brother. They were planning to change the windows, so they thought they could sacrifice one to reach their aim, as nobody would care if one got broken... One day they said to their brother: “Udo, come to the window, look, our neighbour is up to something bad again!” And Udo went to the window to see what his brothers were talking about. Then the others rushed at him and they pushed him towards the window with such strength that it shattered into pieces. And the splinters cut Udo’s veins and he bled into death.
Only five brothers were alive. But they still couldn’t live in peace with each other. So there was a plot again. But the heir was on the watch, so no matter what the others had come up with, they didn’t succeed. But one day they had an unexpected opportunity. Burkhard, the oldest brother was a big fan of arts. He had been longing for Rembrandt’s Raising of Lazarus for a long time, and that time he managed to get it. He started to drill the wall of his room so that he could hang the painting. One of his brothers entered his room to borrow his ring spanner. Then he saw the drill near Burkhard and he had evil thoughts. He sneaked behind Burkhard, grabbed the drill and pierced through his body at the place of his heart. Burkhard was so surprised by the attack that he didn’t even have the time for a last rattle, so he died quietly.
The brothers were only four. They were few, but still not few enough. So the legal heir was again threatened by the lurkering shadows of death. The plot began again. Dietfried, the oldest among the brothers was a fakir so he slept on a bed of nails. His brothers wanted to make use of this habit of his and they already had their evil plan. One night when Dietfried was sleeping deeply, they sneaked in his room holding a large and heavy wardrobe. Then they dropped the wardrobe onto Dietfried who was pierced by thousands of nails. Dietfried woke up and was screaming painfully then said: “To the hell with you, my brothers, I hope you won’t have any joy in the heritage!” And then he died.
Only three brothers were alive. But the fisherman’s house still wasn’t peaceful. One night the middle brother decided to take actions. He sneaked in his brother’s room to stab him while he was asleep. But this brother was on the guard and he woke up to the arrival of the intruder. And then a fierce duel began in which they both died. So the youngest brother had all the wealth. He had been living a life of ease for a ling time when one night he had a strange dream. In his dream he was visited by the ghost of his father who said: “My son, my dear son, I’m so disappointed in you. See, you didn’t take my advice. The unfailable bank account would have provided a good life to everyone.” The boy woke up and he felt big remorse. He felt the urge to make up for all his deeds and to bring his brothers back to life. He had been thinking about what to do for a long time when he had an idea. He visited the Devil itself to beg for help. He went to the headquarters of BKV and went to the chief executive officer who was the Evil itself. When he entered the room, the Devil said to him: “What are you seeking here, pitiful mortal?” “I want to get back my brothers. – said Erkhard – I want to ask for your help.” – “That’s not for free – said the Devil – What do you give me in return?” – “My soul – answered Erkhard – I will serve you till the end of times. “ – “Well good, – said the Evil – let it be.” And with one snapping he raised Erkhard’s brothers from death. The brothers, after having resurrected, started to jubilate and hug each other. “And now I take your soul, – said the Devil – good work must be paid.” But then suddenly there was big brightness and a heavenly voice said: “Erkhard, for your sacrifice we free you from the power of Evil.” And the Devil, before he could protest, was sent back to hell. That was the reason that there was a change of chief executive officer at BKV. And the brothers lived happily ever after.
One day the fisherman went to the city to find a job, but he was sent away from everywhere because of his lack of proper education and professional experience. The fisherman got really embittered and he said with anger: “Ah, it can’t be true in what a damnable worl we live! This damn big bureaucracy! I wouldn’t wish that kind of unliveable world even for my enemies!” A wealthy man passed by who, after having heard the fisherman’s words, started to feel pity for him and said to him: “You poor man, I see you’re living hard times. I have a proposal for you: work for me for minimum wage.” And the fisherman was glad for the opportunity and accepted the offer. And the rich man said only that: “Be exactly at eight o’clock at 13 Wattle Street.” And poor fisherman didn’t know that he had just sold his soul to the Evil.
Next morning the poor fisherman was standing by 13 Wattle Street. After one hour of waiting the rich man appeared. When he saw the fisherman, he said: “You’re a proper man, you were punctual. And now your task: our company is about to conquer the waters. As I know that you’re a fisherman, so you know the capriciousness of the waters, I entrust you to drive our vehicles.” And with that the lord took the fisherman to a big metal box. And the fisherman was just gazing at it and wondered what kind of gear it could be and was really surprised to see that such thing existed. And the lord showed the fisherman how to use the metal monster and then left him alone. And the fisherman splashed down and the box became full of people. But the fisherman couldn’t navigate properly the metal box and soon he got wrecked. The rich man appeared immediately and he was full of fury. “What are you doing, you fisherman? – he asked angrily – As a punishment you’ll be a ticket collector from today.” And he gave an armband to the fisherman.
The fisherman’s life became hell from that day. Endless fights, humiliations and overall many-many scallywags... the fisherman felt as a beached fish. One day he was walking on the riverbank and was brooding about his tragic fate when he heard a voice: “Dear fisherman, - said the voice which belonged to a fish – if you put me back into the water, I’ll fulfill three of your wishes.” But the fisherman didn’t believe the fish and wanted to test it: “I want the metro four to be built!” – he said, and as these words left his mouth, a subway appeared out of nowhere immediately and next to it there was a sign with number four written on it. The fisherman became very happy, because he saw that it really was a wonder-worker fish and he said his second wish: “I want my family not to be in necessity anymore.” “All right, – said the fish – now I have opened an unfailing bank account for you.” Only the third wish was left. The fisherman was thinking for a while and then said: “I want the chief executive officer of BKV (Transport of Budapest Corp.) to die in aortic dissection!” The reason he said that was that he suffered a lot as a ticket collector because of him.
The days passed by and the fisherman and his family were living in wealth thanks to the goldfish. One day they were having lunch when flames bursted up in the room and a terribly ugly giant hamster-like monster appeared. “Fisherman – it said – I came for your life!” “What do you want from me, you monster?” – asked the fisherman incomprehensively. “I’ll take your pitiable life – responded the monster – because those must be punished who wish bad things for my posessor.” “And who is your posessor?” – asked the fisherman. “My posessor is the Devil itself – answered the monster – for whom you wished aortic dissection.” The fisherman became mortified after hearing these words, he sensed that he was in big trouble. And the monster cut the fisherman in half with one swish. The fisherman said to his family with his last breath: “I will die soon, but the most important thing, my children, that you must stick together and love each other.” And with that he died. The family of the fisherman became very sad.
The children didn’t take their father’s advice and soon started to think about how to cut each other out from the heritage. All of them wanted to have the exclusive ownership of the unfailable bank account. As the legal heir was the eldest son, he was the most unwanted person in the other’s eyes. So they came up with an evil plan against him. As part of the demonic plan, they organised a visit to the meat packing plant nearby. When they had plotted it, they said to their brother: “Jürgen, we have a unique chance. We can see from close how the salami is made!” - “Why should that concern me? – asked Jürgen – Anyways I’m a vegetarian.” – “Nay Jürgen, - said the others – knowledge is power.” Finally they managed to convince Jürgen to go with them.
And the brothers went to the meat packing plant. They took a look at all the machines and devices and when they got to the grinder, they pushed Jürgen in. Jürgen started to cry out loud and as the flesh was peeling off his bones he shouted back with his last strength: Curse on you, my foul brothers! May you all burn in the flames of Gehenna! And after that he got grinded and died.
So the fisherman’s children became one person less. But they still were as numbrous as the Russian army, so still there wasn’t any peace at the fisherman’s household. The next target was the second son, because he was the oldest brother alive, the legal heir. The others united against him. There were big heavy aluminium shutters in the house. And the brothers came up with a dreadful idea. They put sharp knives at the bottom of one shutter. Then they called their brother to the window saying: “Günter, come quickly to the window, you have to see it!” And Günter went to the window to see what his brothers had seen. And then the brothers pulled down the shutter which immediately cut Günter’s head off. Günter’s head rolled off to the stream nearby and it left a bloody trace.
So the brothers became one more person less. But they still weren’t few enough to live in peace. So again the younger ones united against the oldest. They had been thinking for a long time about the implementation of the murder when on a bright sunny they they got the inspiration. In their garden the grass had grown big and the oldest brother went out to mow the lawn. Then all the repressed agression came out in the siblings and they attacked their brother. And he was powerless against such numerical superiority. The others took the lawnmower and went over their brother with it. Blood was splurging and pieces of flesh were flying everywhere. And the garden became crimson red.
One more brother less. They were only seven. But they still weren’t few enough. The brothers united again against the legal heir. They didn’t have for too long for the right time. One day their brother was swimming in the pool in the garden, because he was a synchronized swimmer. The brothers got tempted by the Evil and they had a demonic idea. They took a microwave oven and they threw it into the water. Karl, the oldest, died immediately from electric shock.
There were only six brothers. Of course the others started to plot again against the oldest brother. They were planning to change the windows, so they thought they could sacrifice one to reach their aim, as nobody would care if one got broken... One day they said to their brother: “Udo, come to the window, look, our neighbour is up to something bad again!” And Udo went to the window to see what his brothers were talking about. Then the others rushed at him and they pushed him towards the window with such strength that it shattered into pieces. And the splinters cut Udo’s veins and he bled into death.
Only five brothers were alive. But they still couldn’t live in peace with each other. So there was a plot again. But the heir was on the watch, so no matter what the others had come up with, they didn’t succeed. But one day they had an unexpected opportunity. Burkhard, the oldest brother was a big fan of arts. He had been longing for Rembrandt’s Raising of Lazarus for a long time, and that time he managed to get it. He started to drill the wall of his room so that he could hang the painting. One of his brothers entered his room to borrow his ring spanner. Then he saw the drill near Burkhard and he had evil thoughts. He sneaked behind Burkhard, grabbed the drill and pierced through his body at the place of his heart. Burkhard was so surprised by the attack that he didn’t even have the time for a last rattle, so he died quietly.
The brothers were only four. They were few, but still not few enough. So the legal heir was again threatened by the lurkering shadows of death. The plot began again. Dietfried, the oldest among the brothers was a fakir so he slept on a bed of nails. His brothers wanted to make use of this habit of his and they already had their evil plan. One night when Dietfried was sleeping deeply, they sneaked in his room holding a large and heavy wardrobe. Then they dropped the wardrobe onto Dietfried who was pierced by thousands of nails. Dietfried woke up and was screaming painfully then said: “To the hell with you, my brothers, I hope you won’t have any joy in the heritage!” And then he died.
Only three brothers were alive. But the fisherman’s house still wasn’t peaceful. One night the middle brother decided to take actions. He sneaked in his brother’s room to stab him while he was asleep. But this brother was on the guard and he woke up to the arrival of the intruder. And then a fierce duel began in which they both died. So the youngest brother had all the wealth. He had been living a life of ease for a ling time when one night he had a strange dream. In his dream he was visited by the ghost of his father who said: “My son, my dear son, I’m so disappointed in you. See, you didn’t take my advice. The unfailable bank account would have provided a good life to everyone.” The boy woke up and he felt big remorse. He felt the urge to make up for all his deeds and to bring his brothers back to life. He had been thinking about what to do for a long time when he had an idea. He visited the Devil itself to beg for help. He went to the headquarters of BKV and went to the chief executive officer who was the Evil itself. When he entered the room, the Devil said to him: “What are you seeking here, pitiful mortal?” “I want to get back my brothers. – said Erkhard – I want to ask for your help.” – “That’s not for free – said the Devil – What do you give me in return?” – “My soul – answered Erkhard – I will serve you till the end of times. “ – “Well good, – said the Evil – let it be.” And with one snapping he raised Erkhard’s brothers from death. The brothers, after having resurrected, started to jubilate and hug each other. “And now I take your soul, – said the Devil – good work must be paid.” But then suddenly there was big brightness and a heavenly voice said: “Erkhard, for your sacrifice we free you from the power of Evil.” And the Devil, before he could protest, was sent back to hell. That was the reason that there was a change of chief executive officer at BKV. And the brothers lived happily ever after.
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